Tuesday, September 30, 2008

It All Begins With The Ziti

Just to be clear, the ziti I'm referring to is not of the baked variety. It is as in, one zit, two ziti.

Josie has ziti.

She's nine, and she has Mt. Pimpmore on her face. It's not even at the popping phase; it's just big and red and... zitish.

Even more disturbingly, she has what I will lovingly (and somewhat crassly) call Tiny Titties. I'm at a loss as to what to call them, really. I can't in good conscience call them breasts, because they're just not that adult, really, and 'boobs' seems to me to be more what I have, the rounded variety. She and I call them her 'boobies', when we discuss them, but really, they look like TT to me. I suppose have to get her some real bras, not just the kind she has for wearing under her soccer shirt with the too-low-cut armholes.

Wait - BRAS?!?! On my BABY?!? And they're NOT for dress-up?!

What is next, I ask you?!?!?!

OK, OK, I KNOW what's next. And I'm dreading it. I'm telling you right now, if more than one person in this house has PMS at a time, I don't know what will happen! The hysteria! The whining! And that's just me! Oh, lordy, lordy, lordy. The tampons. The deodorant. The shaving. Oh, no. The girl doesn't even like to shower, for heaven's sake! She thinks boys are completely Uninteresting. She CAN'T be going to sprout Body Hair. Her skin is too smooth, too sweet - it simply can't be done.

And yet... there is ziti on her face.

So, here we go. Well, there DH goes, anyway, to hide in the basement, the Low-Estrogen Zone. I will go and help my poor baby deal with her first Facial Albatross. If it's anything like mine, it's the first of many. At least there's that Proactiv stuff, for when things inevitably get out of control (and if she continues to be like me, the ziti will try to stage a coup at some point). Sigh.

10 comments:

Swistle said...

ZOMG, can you believe we're at this stage? Mothers of adolescents!

Mrs. M said...

I started my period at age 9 and also had b cups! YUCK!

I was a big fan of the clean and clear face wash when I was young. They have great toner and moisturizer to go with it as well and is great for the complexion. They also have a zit product that is a little gel you dab on it at night and helps dry them up.

I know you didn't ASK for this "advice" but it wasn't so long ago I was that age and I'm currently raising my teenage brother. I hope it helps...a little anyway

Kristi said...

NO NO NO. Josie's 9 right? I can't handle the idea of Kaeli sprouting TT and pimples in only 3 years! NO NO NO.

LoriD said...

Oh man. My tummy hurts thinking that this stuff can start as young as 9 years old. I was a bit of a late bloomer, so I'm hoping my daughter follows the family trend.

Shelly Overlook said...

OMG this is giving me nightmares just thinking about it. But that's your BAAABBYYY!!! Holy hell, Batman.

Kristin.... said...

Can I just say I'm so glad I'm not the only one! Meg is 7........and we've got the ziti on the chin and the TT. OMG!

d e v a n said...

wow. She's still so young!

creative kerfuffle said...

ah yes, welcome to my world. the girl is 11. we bought the 1st REAL bra this summer. last year she had the little emerging pointies and she just wore the tankini top thingy and it was fine. but this summer they started getting rounder and more..noticeable. the hubs about had a stroke over the real bras. plus the girl not only tells me but has to SHOW me she's getting hair. down. there. it's nearly invisible. last night she tells me she's having a discharge. (sorry if anyone was eating). i'd forgotten about that, but read online--it is the precursor to aunt flo. both of us? flowing? yeah, the FUN is about to begin. NOT

Sherry said...

If I may suggest, Nuetrogena Deep Clean Facial Cleanser. Even though it says "deep clean" it's very gentle on your skin and awesome for daily facial cleansing and break out control. Both my teens use it, and I use it daily. (because apparently I'm still going through puberty at 38)
And oh my, this is the age it all begins, my dear. My baby girl is 16 now and I feel your pain. It was one thing when she started using my make up and hair products, but it's all and out WAR when the tampons and Midol go missing! ;)

Marie Green said...

From the way I understand it from my peditrician friend, usually about 2 years after you notice body changes she'll start menstruating. So, breast today, periods tomorrow, basically. Well not TOMORROW, but in a couple of years. CRAZY!