Considering the Options

DH and I are talking about adopting.

I've always wanted to either foster or adopt, or both, both because I think it's a great thing to do and because, that could have been me. Once my father left, I had no family other than my mother, and if that guidance counselor had believed me when I told her what was going on at my house when I was in third grade, social services would have been at our door in no time. In retrospect, I'm glad I was able to stay, because at least I was able to go to college and move on with my life, whereas had I been put in The System, who knows where I'd be now.

Anyway, I browse the foster care photo listings occasionally, just thinking about it, and last week I came across a girl who looks a lot like Josie, just a few years older. I couldn't stop thinking about her. I thought about her for three days before I got up the nerve to say anything to DH, and even then, I thought, really, that he was going to tell me I'm nuts, bring me to my senses, and on we'd go.

He didn't.

We were sitting at Uno's, and I blurted out, 'what would you think about adopting?', and without hesitation, he said that it sounded like a great idea to him. I could have cried. Josie was with us (Patrick was in the bathroom), and as I told DH what I'd seen, she started listening; after a minute she started almost bouncing in her seat, asked if we were thinking about adopting her a sister, and could they share a room! By this time, Patrick had come back (he tends to dawdle in bathrooms, so he'd been gone for awhile), and Josie told him what we'd been talking about. He looked at us, smiled, and said that that sounded nice. I was so proud of them both; neither one had any qualms whatsoever. Since then, I've talked to them individually about what exactly that would mean, with the sharing of their parents, and the conversion of the finished attic from a playroom into a bedroom, and they're both still really into it.

I talked to social services yesterday, and they're sending us out a packet of into on what we have to do. MD requires anyone adopting a child that's not an infant to take a 9 week class, one evening a week, on whatever it is they want us to know. I can't imagine what on earth will take 27hrs to teach us, but I suppose it's for people who don't already have children as well, so maybe that's part of it, as well as making sure people are really committed and not just looking for a check (foster parents get a monthly check from the govt). I'm sure it will be full of good info, though. Once we're done with that, we will be cleared to foster and adopt any available child we choose.

Since the next class doesn't start until fall, that will give us time to convert the playroom into a bedroom, and put the new carpet squares down in the basement, which will let us move everything from the attic that needs to be moved somewhere else down there. There really isn't a lot up there other than toys, so it won't be too hard. It'll make a really cool room, actually; I had been thinking about letting Josie use it when she was older, but this will work out fine, too. Also, my evening grad classes will be over in August, so there will be no conflict there.

It looks like the earliest we'll be able to think about having someone new in the house is after Thanksgiving, and maybe not until after the new year, since while it would probably be nice to allow a child to have a Christmas with us, depending on the scheduling it probably wouldn't be the most stable environment to bring a new child into, with how crazy everyone's schedules get around Xmas. We'll have to see. For now, all we know for sure is that in the next year, we're probably going to be adding a new older girl to the family.