OK, OK - you guys got me, I apparently messed up. I'm glad you all have been honest with me, rather than gloss over it. I'm embarrassed. The chances that I was too close in to this one to see that I was making a mistake are pretty high. Even though we aren't coffee-and-tea friends, I do enjoy knowing her as a fellow parent, and I was awake a lot last night thinking about this. I went back and forth all night, between feeling that I hadn't done wrong by posting about my own kid, but that on the other hand I had upset someone without meaning to and that was wrong.
So, this morning I wrote and apologized. I explained that when Josie came to me in tears, it brought back all my fears of my kids having the same problems that I had had, and since I was on fb already, I reached out for advice and support from friends. I told her that I was upset at some of the comments that people had left and had followed up their comments with another of my own saying thanks, but the girl wasn't a bad kid, she had good parents, and that I was sad that their friendship wasn't doing well, before deleting the whole mess after long enough that anyone who had posted would have seen it. I said that I was sorry that I hadn't emailed her first, but that ironically I hadn't wanted to upset her with another email, and that I hadn't been thinking about her being on fb as well (which is, ok, a small lie, but I really hadn't been thinking about her seeing the comments from other people, so I let myself get away with it) or I would have called people rather than throwing out a net to look for support. I said that I wasn't trying to be malicious or unfriendly, and I certainly hadn't been looking for anyone else to be so. I closed by reiterating that I was sorry she was upset.
That's the best I can do, really. At least I can go forward now knowing that. I'm not perfect, and I hate it when I mess up. Hopefully she will accept my apology and we can move forward. If we never hook up on fb again, I'm fine with that, but I would at least like to be able to run into her and not feel like there's something I could have done to make it better. We probably won't see each other much after the next month, anyway, since the school year will be over and middle school isn't like elementary school - if you don't make an effort to see other kids' parents, you don't. I just want to be able to hold my head up and know I've done the best I can.
She won't see my email for awhile because she's at work until 1, so I won't know anything until at least this afternoon, if she responds at all.
2 months ago