Monday, September 7, 2009

Missing You

I am so sorry I haven't been reading any blogs lately. I miss hearing about you all so much, my friends, and I'm hoping to catch up tomorrow when the kids are at school. I have literally been consumed by trigonometry, to the point that I am dreaming about it (and not in a nice way). My mind is so entrenched in Words that random letters have always been very, very distracting, and I end up spending time wondering why, for instance, an equation says f(x)=3x+2, when really, f(x) just means the Y axis. THEN I get caught up in worrying that the substitutions actually have some mysterious meaning, expecially when OTHER random letters, like H or I come to call, with seemingly no calling card or introduction at all. Why are THEY there?! Who invited them? What do they mean? It makes me just want to make a nice soup out of them all and be done.

So, to do a brief catch-up on me:

1. I have an appointment with the graduate advisor for the program I'm hoping to get into on Wed afternoon. Cross your fingers that they will allow me to substitute my sociology major for the 1 psychology class they like to see for admission, and that they won't give me the same crap about supposedly not having algebra math credits that the undergrad school did.

2. I have an appointment on the 14th to get fingerprinted and interviewed by the county to get officially hired as a substitute. The following Monday there's a 2hr orientation session, and after that, I'm free to start, so I'll hopefully be working by the end of the month.

3. Josie got her yellow belt last week, but I didn't get it on video b/c the recorder screwed up. I'll put up a photo soon, though. She totally kicked butt.

4. I went to a family gathering yesterday, against my better judgement, and it went fine even though my stressful sister-in-law and her husband were there. Their babies, unfortunatly, look very much like their father, who is not feminine at all. While I do not feel any attachment to either the parents, or the babies (still), it was fine, and I held a baby most of the time as a distraction. There were no outbursts or arguments. Perhaps I'll feel more connected to the babies once they're bigger; I suppose it's difficult to feel connected to children of people you really don't like and rarely see.

OK, I think that's it. DH took the kids to the movies so I could have a few hours' peace and quiet to study. I think I'm actually going to take my stuff over to Panera, which should be quiet this time of the afternoon, and have a coffee. I'm sick of sitting at the dining room table, and to do the next section I have to get a calculator that will actually have a bunch of functions on it, so I might as well combine the two. I really need to not be studying late at night if I can help it, at least until I break the dreaming pattern. The last three nights I've not only dreamed about it, but also spent a good half hour in that half-awake state stressing over vague problems I can't quite picture because I'm not fully awake. It's not conducive to a good night's rest, people.


Hotch Potchery said...

When I was in school (and even know when I am working on a paper) I spent A LOT of time at Panera. Enjoy!

AndreAnna said...

I know what you mean about the dreaming thing. I can't read certain books or stories before bed because I have those weird-continuous dreams about them.

Bring A. Torch said...

Yeesh, did you have to get one of those huge calculators that people play Tetris on? My very best wishes--I know you can do it!

Anonymous said...

We miss you, too, but we totally understand. Seriously.

creative kerfuffle said...

why do i read this and immediately think of good will hunting? LOL you are a math whiz in my book--hell, i have no idea what you were even talking about.
and, i totally understand the part about not being close to kids because you aren't close to their parents. it sucks, but what can you do? i am not close to my sister and therefore don't feel the same toward that niece/nephew as i do to my other. i can't help it. i love them of course, but i don't have the bond w/ them.

Nowheymama said...

We understand! Write when you can/want to.

Not Your Aunt B said...

Dear God, woman, should you ever feel the need to post any more math on your blog, GIVE US WARNING! Just seeing it (because I, on the other hand, am not quite sure I know what f(x) is) makes me panic. Sweat. Heart racing. I will have nightmares tonight of it.

Yay for almost being done with the substitute red tape and for Josie. I have a hard time connecting with kids whose parents I don't like either- I think it is easier when they are babies as they are pretty easy, but as they get into the terrible twos I just lump their terrible behavior with their parents. Horrible of me, I know, but I can't help it.

Panera. Yum.