Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Thanks for the Extra White Hairs

I find as I get older, the number of things I'm afraid of has gotten smaller in some ways, but bigger in others.

For instance, I'm finally not afraid of the dark (which took longer than usual because of that damn Scream movie, which I can't even think about without feeling all squirmy inside). I'm not afraid to be alone at night when DH is on a trip, and our old house is creaking. I'm not afraid of spiders (although they're still GROSS). Things like that.

The things I *am* scared of, though, have gotten larger and much more specific. One of those things is that we'll have a Home Invasion. I'm not talking about a regular break-in, where someone takes your stuff and leaves; I'm talking about the kind our neighbors almost had, and that I hear about on the new sometimes - the kind where a group of men break into the house seemingly for the express purpose of hurting people. I don't know if this is some kind of gang thing, or what, but it seems that I hear about that kind of thing more and more lately.

I was actually laying in bed this morning after DH left for work at 6, thinking about this, when I heard a noise that wasn't the usual creaking of the pipes. It was a quite sound, one of those that you almost don't even really hear, but it was enough that Baci, sleeping next to me on the bed, lifted his head up, too. I had just decided that it was nothing when I heard a definite squeak of the back door opening downstairs. I sat up, and my heart started racing. No way, I thought. How can somebody be breaking in WHILE I'M WORRYING ABOUT SOMEONE BREAKING IN?! It flashed in my mind that DH had left about twenty minutes before, a similar circumstance as the attempted invasion across the street.

At the sound of a heavy footstep in the entryway, I sprang out of bed and flew to Josie's room, intending to pull her into Patrick's room and barricade the room shut with his bed. I grabbed the door, hearing what was obviously a man coming towards the stairs, and flung it open just as I heard, 'It's me - I forgot my wallet' from the landing.

I'm telling you, I almost collapsed. I shut Josie's door and grabbed onto the frame for dear life. All the adrenaline flooded out of me, and my whole body went cold. I had to get back onto the bed and sit down. I was too scared to even cry.

DH apologized up and down, saying he knew there would be no way to get in without scaring me, which isn't true because if he had SAID SOMETHING while he was downstairs everything would have been fine, but I couldn't even say that. Thank goodness he said something when he did, before I got to Josie and woke her up by telling her there was someone in the house. I was just so happy that no one was coming into our house, making their way straight to the upstairs, where the kids are, especially my daugher who is starting to look like a Girl, that I didn't even care. It took a good ten minutes for my heart to stop racing. Even writing this has me a little freaked out again.

You may have noticed that I didn't mention any barking, or growling, from the dogs. Those damn fools, who bark all day at people, dogs and birds going by the house, did not ONE THING? Baci didn't get up until I did, and even then stayed with me rather than running downstairs. Delilah didn't get up at all. A hundred and fifty pounds of teeth between them, and not one thing! And it wasn't that they knew it was him, either, because that would have had them up and running.

So, everything else seems really unimportant today. If I don't get a job when I graduate, if the IRS charges us an arm and a leg this year, whatever, I don't care. My babies got off to school safe and sound, and were none the wiser.


Marie Green said...

I worry about that kind of thing too. And I AM still scared, sometimes, when David isn't home.

Glad everything is ok!

AndreAnna said...

We have an alarm system for this exact thing. If Mike had to come back after leaving, I would have heard him put in his code.

And then kneed him in the balls.

My dogs would also lick the face of the man killing me, I'm sure of it.

ALW said...

I hate scares like that too. But like you, I am FINALLY not scared of the dark or spiders any more. It's funny how some things fade and others grow.

Stimey said...

That is so scary. I can only imagine how terrified you must have been. I was scared for you just reading this.

And I know what you mean about non-guard dogs. Our dog would probably try to lick an intruder to death, but unless he was afraid of dog germs, he'd probably walk right by.

Also, I notice that ALW claims she's not scared of certain things. Ask her about bees.

d e v a n said...

Just reading that made me freak a little bit. A home invasion is one of my biggest fears. Eek! I need to go read something happy now, before I go to bed - as I am still afraid of the dark!

Sarah said...

Our dog is totally useless too. I always try to comfort myself thinking he would definitely alert us/scare away any intruders if such a thing were to happen, but I pretty much know he would either snore away or lick the burglar's hand in greeting before showing him to our bedroom.
This is my Number One Fear too, btw. And probably totally not rational, but there it is. The idea of being not safe in our own home is just horrifying.

Bring A. Torch said...

Oh my COW, how scary, esp. after the thing at the neighbor's. Very glad things are well. I love your phrase about Josie starting to look like a Girl.

creative kerfuffle said...

ditto this whole post. being home during the day alone for a good bit of it my mind tends to wander to things like this. i also worry i'll drive up and the house will be on fire. or someone will break in in the middle of the night. my dogs--who also bark at people walking down our road, or a squirrel or people working in their yards, would most likely be useless if someone actually did break in. i also get freaked out sometimes taking a shower when home alone. the hubs has come home mid-morning and scared the hell out of me when i'm in the shower so that's where that comes from.

Sherendipity said...

You need an alarm system. Not because it's a deterrent to burglars,(even though it is) but because it will give you piece of mind. They're a lot less expensive than they used to be, and will be well worth the money.